An Ending?

I'm lost in life.
Passed up by the times, by all the people who care less.
I don't know when, but something got into my mind.
It was there, as it had always been.
I never looked at it this way, as I was now.
I put it over myself, just thinking.
I noticed it wasn't working, so I closed it off.
Almost immediately, I started feeling it, that little bit less that I needed. Every breath caused my thoughts to wonder if it would be my last.
I got scared, and started feeling weak,
I pulled it off quickly, and teared it to shreds, so I could no do it again.
I don't know what had come into my mind.
I didn't plan it, it was more of an instinct.
Now that I look back, it was fun, but the thought of trying it again, makes my breath go shallow, and my heart slow a little,
But, that's a part of my life, now.